Ever since I knew I was going to pursue writing a book I imagined one day being on the studios of ABC4 Good Things Utah telling about my story and book.
Guess what!?!?!?
I'm scheduled to be on Good Things Utah this coming Monday, April 4th!!!!!! Show airs on ABC4 at 10:00 Live!
In just two days one of my dreams will come true! I'm elated for this opportunity to share my information with the their large audience. I can't wait to meet the ladies and hopefully help viewers.
Of course I will be posting all about it so don't forget to pop back in here after Monday. I know my segment will also be available on their website after the show.
I don't know for sure their ticket availability but I do know they have a live audience and here is the link to get your tickets, I believe they are FREE. It would great seeing you there! (Their studio is in Salt Lake City)
Beautiful and valiant are the two words that come to mind when describing the young women I spoke to this week at a Stake Fireside in Pleasant Grove.
What amazingly strong young women we have in these days. As I spoke to the chapel full of their beaming faces I felt the overwhelming love their Father in Heaven has for them. The sad part is seeing how few of them knew it.
My presentations change a bit depending on the event, however when speaking to women of any age I always feel the impression that these daughters need to be reminded of their divine worth, inner beauty, and the power in knowing that they're daughters of the most powerful God.
No doubt Satan knows his greatest tool in keeping these young women and us from actually completing our sacred mission on earth is keeping us blinded to the fact that we are deeply loved spiritual daughters with infinite worth and potential.
Think of that, literally we cannot fulfill our purpose, or mission, part of our reason for this existence on Earth if Satan can destroy our self-worth.He can halt our service to others, and our personal growth with this one tool.
Wednesday I shared quotes such as the quote I have as my blog header above and this one:
“As daughters of God, you cannot imagine the divine potential within each of you. Being a daughter of God means that if you seek it, you can find your true identity. You will know who you are. This will make you free—not free from restraints, but free from doubts, anxieties, or peer pressure. You will not need to worry, “Do I look all right?” “Do I sound OK?” “What do people think of me?” A conviction that you are a daughter of God gives you a feeling of comfort in your self-worth. It means that you can find strength in the balm of Christ. It will help you meet the heartaches and challenges with faith and serenity.” --- James. E. Faust
As I spoke I saw many girls squirm in their seats as I told them how beautiful and amazing they were.
I saw girls uncomfortably ducking as if saying "that doesn't apply me, my worth is not great. I am not beautiful."
I get it. I was once there and still need to be reminded at times that I'm good enough, and loved.
I too need to rise above such feelings at times, but how grateful I am that the debilitating low self-esteem is something I have left behind forever.
I pray the girls and women I speak to will feel their worth and commit to sustaining and cultivating this truth.
Wonderfully, on Wednesday night there were many that have internalized these principals and radiated with this conviction.
But seeing the few that battled to accept their self broke my heart. I imagined how it must feel for our Father and Mother in Heaven watching their children be oblivious to and even denying their great value.
What can we do?
There are several things as individuals we can do to feel our worth and things we can do to help our children.
Of course I am always saying start with yourself! If you have a good self-esteem that will flow to your children.
Today I would like to stick to one challenge that I extended to the young women at the fireside, simply pray to know your worth, pray to feel His love for you.
I know our Father in Heaven will answer your sincere prayers.
This Thursday morning I'm going to be interviewed on the radio show called Divine Light Within with hostess Bonnie Ross. It airs live at 9:00 (MST) and can be heard any time afterword. It is another interview out of Canada which is always exciting.
Hostess Bonnie Ross.
If you want to learn more about her and what she does feel free to visit her site http://www.bonnieross.com/.
I'm really frustrated with the dumb things parents say that leave a lasting scar on their children. I have received countless letters, phone calls, e-mails. ect... from people all over the world and everyone without fail will mention some comment, usually said by a father, that hurt them deeply and ended up being one of the triggers for their eating disorder.
I've mentioned this in my book and I often tell this in my interviews, but as a teen I picked up the message from my dad that being heavier was not ok. I saw his looks of disapproval when someone had seconds on desert, and heard comments like, "do you really need that." It was nothing extreme but enough to add to my triggers of having anorexia.
I tend to think most the comments are made in ignorance by a parent or loved one not realizing how sensitive someone with an eating disorder (or tendency toward one) is.
That is why I'm doing this post. Awareness is power when it comes to eating disorders.
A sad thing is I have talked to several girls who have relapsed because of a comment. The comment, "You are filling out nicely," can have good intentions behind it but to someone battling with anorexia she hears "you are getting fat." And this can cause a relapse.
The best thing to do if you have a family member with an eating disorder is not make physically comments at all. It's too bad but true with any physical comment, even one meant as a compliment, someone with an eating disorder or who are self conscious about themselves will always twist it in their mind to be a negative comment. You really can't win so just steer away from physical remarks.
Often it doesn't even have to be an actual comment but body language, or a message sent unintentionally.
Another comment that really drives me crazy is when someone says, " I wish I had an eating disorder for a little while" as they pat their belly implying they could use it as a "tool" to loose weight.
I'm just asking first of all, be aware of comments you tell your children about their weight and food. You never know which comment will stick with them and cause problems down the road.
Second, be sensitive. Obvious comments about food, appearance, and diets are something my associates and myself are extra sensitive to but being aware and in control of your words could really help prevent heartache for those around you.
I just noticed that you can "like" the link for facebook so if you have a second feel free to pop in and "like" my book at Barnes and Noble or even leave a rating or review! Thanks!
The audio of Breakthrough: Peace with Food, Peace with your Body is now only 9.95
(the conference was a $40 event)
I speak along with several other remarkable ladies about women's relationship with food, self-acceptance, spiritual connection with nutrition, and more. This audio includes the entire day long convention filled with life changing presentations and breathtaking musical performances.
Purchase now by clicking on button below
Don't forget the bundle deal still available you get both a signed copy of A Future for Tomorrow and the audio of Breakthrough for a great price!
Break Through Audio and A Future for Tomorrow Book Bundle Deal Button below
I'm excited to be interviewed by Elizabeth Cuckson this Thurs. Dec. 23rd at 11:00 MST. You can listen live or at your convenience any time afterward by going to the Healing Hearts Radio link.
We will be discussing my story and book, A Future for Tomorrow, self-worth, media messages, along with tips for parents to help them create a healthy relationship with food for their children, and more.
During the interview you can call in your questions or comments at this number: (626) 213-5697.
This interview will be out of Colorado.
Here is a little info about the radio hostess
Elizabeth Cuckson: Radio Host, Motivational Speaker and Spiritual Life Coach
Elizabeth Cuckson is known for her loving guidance in helping people let go of the past and creating their hearts desire. She hosts a radio show on this topic called "Healing Hearts". Elizabeth is a Motivational Speaker and Spiritual Life Coach who offers a unique and authentic way of coaching based on real life experiences.
I have been impressed with Elizabeth and look forward to talking to her. She barely returned from Vietnam doing charity work with schools and orphanages there. I love the pictures she posted on facebook about her trip.
I hope you join our chat this Thursday, at 11:00 a.m !
This post is about an e-mail I received from my good friend Karen Eddington. She is the founder of the Cauliflower Retreat which I have mentioned several times. You also can get on her mailing list to get these great self-esteem tips, updates, and online training content. Just go to their home page http://www.selfworthretreat.com/ website (also cauliflowerretreat.com or org)
"It is common theme I hear over and over. "My daughter is struggling with self-esteem. What can I do?" "My students are so worried about fitting in, how can I get through to them?" "I have a friend who is really struggling to find confidence. Is there something I can do to help her?" "I don't even know who I am anymore."
After ten years of researching these issues, doing outreach work across the state of Utah, and presenting on self-worth topics on a national level, I have started to see some common solutions that need to be made more available as a prevention medium. Here are some quick examples how we can think and act more positively about self-worth:
Recognize there is a principle of choice, accountability, and action when it comes to developing self-confidence.
Understand the difference between self-worth, self-esteem and potential. We need to educate our families, students, and loved ones that self-worth is already established. Our value as a person is not conditional. If we are looking to outside sources to define how important we are, the perception of our worth (our self-esteem-- ah, see the difference) is limited to that same exterior source.
We don't one day, unexplainably, "find" ourselves. We can however create ourselves.
Developing self-confidence is explainable. High self-esteem is not just magically bestowed upon a lucky few people. A high self-esteem comes from developing skills, implementing knowledge and building awareness.
Participate Now Program to Teach Self-Worth Skills
We shouldn't have to wait for a tragedy, a therapy session, or have to blindly struggle to learn these techniques and skills. It is time for these resources to be widely shared in order to help our everyday women and teens. We have an exciting announcement for you. Alongside Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Cory Eddington (he is also the same guy who asked me to marry him nine years ago) we have created prevention tools that can be easily shared with you, without you having to make the drive to visit our outreach center.
Over the coming months we are making available MP3 audio files, e-workbooks, and other educational tools that you can access instantly online. Due to your high demand we are making these programs as accessible as possible.
To watch our recent KSL Studio 5 "Self-Worth Starts at Home" TV interview link here
The next tool we are sharing is on Thinking Errors. This is a BIG concept because not very many people know about them. Yet, we all tend to fall into the thinking error trap. Hope you will enjoy the upcoming free audio.
We will be in touch again soon. We look forward to sharing these skills with you!
All the best,
Karen Eddington
Cauliflower Retreat Self-Worth Outreach Center Program Found"
I just want to add my thoughts on how to help your daughters have good self-esteem-- start with yourself. Emulate what it means to love yourself and have a good self-esteem. Also NEVER let her hear you put yourself down. Not only does she see the same traits that you are putting down in herself but she learns how to act as a woman from you.
Assignment:
If you have a habit of putting yourself down in front of your children, stop. My challenge is to catch yourself and stop the words, sighs, and other self-deprecating expressions in front of your daughters.
Next step is to stop them in your own mind and replace them with a positive thoughts about yourself.
Incorporate what Karen mentioned about there being choice behind having a good self-esteem. CHOOSE to improve your own perception of yourself.
I'm excited to release the recording of Breakthrough: Peace with Food, Peace with your Body Women's Conference which I spoke at.
The presentations were powerful and life changing The musical performances were touching and simply beautiful. I am so thrilled to share this conference with you!
The recording includes the following presentations:
Cherie Burton "Nourish Thyself: The Divine Stewardship over Your Physical Temple"
Jarah Christensen "Eating From the Soul"
Haley Freeman "Starving to LIFE"
Jen Marco Handy - Musical Presentation with presentation
Annette Mease “Unlock the Door to Your Brilliance”
Mia Magistro "Breaking Free of Unhealthy Food Obsession and Addiction" (includes musical presentation)
Steffanie England "The Power of Food to Heal and to Harm"
Jessie Clark Funk “Own Your Life” (includes musical presentation)
Since I'm a visual person my presentations are largely visual as well. That is why when you purchase the recording through me I will include pictures and video links so you can experience my presentation completely.
The convention's ticket admission price was between $30-40. The price for the recording is only 12.99!!
To save resources and for your convenience the recording and related information will be sent straight to your computer.
You can order this women's convention now! Just click below on the BUY NOW button to get started.
(If demand is adequate a cd will be made available)
SPECIAL PACKAGE DEAL
I am offering a special bundle price for ordering both my book A Future for Tomorrow (copies are signed) and the recording download of the Breakthrough women's conference.
For only 22.95 (regularly 29.94 for both, savings of almost $7.00)
Click below for savings!
I work with several girls and women all over the world as a mentor. I try to give them hope and support through their eating disorder. This week I have had many come to me with fears about Thanksgiving.
Here is an article that I hope can be helpful. The writer has gathered several tips from different sources. Here are some, for full tips and more info you can follow the links from the article.
Eat regularly and in some kind of reasonable pattern. Avoid “preparing for the last supper.” Don’t skip meals and starve in attempt to make up for what you recently ate or are about to eat. Keep a regular and moderate pattern.
Worry more about the size of your heart than the size of your hips! It is the holiday season, a great time to reflect, enjoy relationships with loved ones, and most importantly a time to feel gratitude for blessings received and a time to give back through loving service to others.
Have a well thought out game plan before you go home or invite others into your home. Know “where the exits are,” where your support persons are, and how you’ll know when it’s time to make a brief exit and get connected with needed support.
Write down your vision of where you would like your mind and heart to be during this holiday time with loved ones. Take time, several times per day, to find a quiet place to become in tune again with your vision, to remember, to nurture, and to center yourself into those thoughts, feelings, and actions which are congruent with your vision for yourself.
Remember that there are no “good” or “bad” foods, even at a holiday meal, but be prepared for others to make comments about food, weight gain/loss and diets during holiday gatherings. Decide how you will respond if this happens. A range of responses could include a silent mantra that you say to yourself in your head or a public comment that educates others about normal eating and positive body image. Ask yourself which type of response will be most beneficial for your own personal well-being and use that as a guide. When it’s time for the meal, try to sit near people with whom you feel comfortable and supported. If this isn’t possible, try to avoid sitting directly by those who will make the meal more challenging.
Don’t leave home without your toolbox - If you’ve established coping skills that work when you’re feeling overwhelmed or having thoughts of acting on your eating disorder – be sure to pack a travel-friendly version! If writing in your journal or listening to a special playlist on your iPod helps you, then throw them in the suitcase! This will also help to maintain some normalcy during the hectic holiday schedule.
Don’t forget to breathe! - This may sound simple, but it is sound advice. Breathing affects the whole body. When you take a few seconds to breathe slowly and deeply, even in a stressful situation, you can actually produce a state of relaxation. Try the following:
• Sit as tall as possible with your feet flat on the floor, and try to take your mind off of the stressful situation or activities around you.
• Take a slow, deep breath in (your stomach should expand as it fills with air)while counting to three.
• Hold your breath for a count of three.
• Exhale slowly (your stomach should contract) while counting to three.
• Repeat this whole sequence three times.
Now check in with yourself. Are you feeling a little better? If so, return to the activity around you. If not, take a little more time out to repeat the process or try another one of the coping skills listed above.
For people with binge eating disorder or bulimia, it can be difficult to survey the holiday feast knowing that you can easily eat it all twice over and then some. If you struggle with intuitive eating and are concerned about taking unnaturally large portion sizes, take cues from the serving sizes of others around you. Don’t make any food off-limits and don’t eat alone.
If you struggle with binging types of disorders, distract yourself after eating so that you’ll be less likely to purge. Check out my more general tips on how to reduce binging urges here.
The holidays are a time to catch up with friends and family you don’t see often and reunions can sometimes invite comments on your appearance, especially if it’s notably different. Again, changing the subject or walking away usually works, as does speaking up — “You’re making me feel very self-conscious. Please stop.” Sometimes the comments are well-intentioned, in which case assuaging the worries of your loved ones can quell concerns and comments — “I’m working with a professional to better improve my health. Thanks for the concern.” For people on the opposite end of the weight spectrum, even loved ones can be cruel in pointing out weight gain. Humor is a great way to diffuse an awkward and tension-filled moment, so be sure to check out these clever quips from Joy Nash. And don’t be afraid to be honest — “Wow, that was a rude comment.”
Let go of perfection – as best as you can. There’s no such thing as the perfect present. I struggle with being an imperfect perfectionist a lot. Which usually means that I procrastinate and end up getting stressed along the way. Sure, it’s only a few days till Christmas, but if you don’t have that perfect present, decor, outfit, or whatever, give yourself permission to be imperfect. Welcome flexibility, even with baby steps.
Be kind to yourself. You know that holidays are a struggle for you and you’ll do the best you can. Whatever you do this holiday season, let it come from a place of kindness and self-acceptance. Accept that whatever plan you have in place, you may still get stressed or have anxiety around food and certain family members. Just acknowledge that you’re trying and be proud of yourself for that. Remember to take care of yourself and your needs, too, instead of getting lost in the hustle and bustle. If that means taking ten minutes to do some yoga poses, write in your journal, take a longer shower or call a friend for support, go for it. And remember to enjoy yourself, as well.
Ok, it's me talking again. =0) I want to leave a message of hope. I know you can get through the holidays and eventually leave your ed behind forever. I promise there is a life full of joy waiting for you!
It was a great experience being on the show Get Inspired Radio with Sue London this week. If you missed the live interview you can still listen to it!Here is the link Surviving Anorexia with Guest Haley Hatch Freeman
Wed. Nov 10th at 9:00 am I am going to be on a live radio show where you can call into the studio and ask me or the host questions. The radio station is Get Inspired Radio out of Canada. I'm excited to do my first international interview!
Here is what you need to know.
Haley Hatch Freeman is the author of A Future for Tomorrow which tells her remarkable true story of enduring and overcoming anorexia it also details miracles along the way.
She is an expert on women’s relationships with food, self-worth, media messages, true beauty and other eating behaviors.
Haley is an active public speaker, presenting at conventions, schools, church groups, retreats, and more.
She has been interviewed on TV and several radio shows.
Her story has been featured in national publications and her book is available worldwide. To learn more a about Haley and her book A Future for Tomorrow please visit : http://www.afuturefortomorrow.com// Tune into http://www.blogtalkradio.com/life-coach-sue at 9:00 am MST (11:00 am EST) and get inspired! Phone your questions in to (646) 929-0076 and press 1 to speak to the host during the live show. Chat lines open during the show. Can't make the live show? Tune into the archived segment and listen at your convenience.This show will also be found archived on iTunes podcasts.
I was so excited to see Karen on Studio 5 this week. You might remember me mentioning her before. I was able to speak at her self-esteem outreach retreat this summer. Click here to read my post about that event.
This is what Sudio 5 posted about her: Karen Eddington is the founder and owner of Cauliflower Retreat, self-worth outreach program for everyday women and teens. She shares tips to help every parent build self-worth within the home
Each of us faces pressures. Sometimes pressures and challenges can cause us to question ourselves. No matter if you're a mother, aunt, sister, or father you can play a vital role in establishing self-confidence within a family. The home is the place where we grow up, the people we live with, and it is the foundation for our values. No matter what circumstances you are in, your example and influence within the home matters.
1. Teach the stable nature of self-worth: Contrary to all the messages we see, our value as a person is constant. Sometimes we feel like we lose value if we get cut from the dance team, gain weight, or don't have an income. Sometimes we feel like we gain value if we have a makeover, lose weight, or are offer a position of important. Self-Worth is always there. Our self-esteem, which is our perception of our value, is often what changes. Teaching the constant nature of worth can help bring a feeling of security.
2. Recognize and replace thinking errors: A thinking error is a thought we may dwell on that is restrictive or false. For example, "Nobody likes me." When we have a thinking error we are often overlooking other facts or positive factors. The moment you catch yourself thinking restrictively, stop, and replace the false statement with something you know to be true. "Yes, people do like me. My mom likes me. The girl in my math class likes me." You can help those in your home to recognize and replace thinking errors. Here are a few more examples of thinking errors: "I have no talents." "I'm a bad mother." "I never win anything."
3. Don't find yourself, create yourself: There are times in life we feel lost. We may have heard or used the expression, "I've got to find out who I am." Part of living is growing. We won't just wake-up one day and find ourselves, rather ever moment of our lives is about creating ourselves. Our identity is about choices and being accountable for our choices. If someone in your home is feeling lost in terms of their identity help them discover things they look forward to, goals they are working on, and work they can engage in.
4. Bring out the best in each other: Take time to look for the good in each other. Treat one another as the person we can become. As families spend a lot of time together, it can be easy to get hung up on our bad habits, focus on tendencies, and label one another. Example: "Mary is shy, Ryan is athletic, or Kim is talkative." Yes, it is good to share affirmations when someone does something good, but don't limit one another. Even if someone in your family is shy, don't keep dwelling on that label. Treat one another as we can become.
5. Be the refuge: You can create a safe environment, through communication, love and support. Especially amid times of struggle, be there to talk, listen and love one another. Make an effort to know what is going on with each person in your home. Take time to learn their hopes, fears, and goals. Ask questions so you understand the best and worst parts of their day. Create that atmosphere of love and safety.
My friend Lori has a new book out that I am honored to spotlight. She is a remarkable woman with so many talents, including illustrating and writing. This is her first published novel and I'm thrilled for her!
Here is the info from the back of her book:
Trish Ingram works hard to maintain the perfect suburban household—or, at least, the appearance of one. By managing her outer world with lavish attention and rigid control, she’s able to ignore and conceal the darkness of her inner world, which is plagued by traumatic childhood memories of loss. Her terminally ill sister-in-law, Jamie, sees through the façade and reaches out in love to Trish, inspiring her to seek a more meaningful life and a more authentic self. But the childhood scars run deep, and despite Trish’s best efforts, she’s unable to be the wife and mother her family needs.
Devastated by the departure of her husband and daughter, Trish faces the challenge and opportunity of a lifetime. She desires to move forward in faith, but this desire alone cannot mend her family's shattered trust. The hollow realm of denial and fear has been her safe haven. To confront pain and transcend the shadows of her past will require a level of courage she’s not sure she possesses. This gripping story of familial love and conflict tenderly reminds us that forgiveness—of self, and others—is both a difficult choice and a precious gift.
Here is a little about the author (love her!)
Lori Nawyn's award-winning writing has appeared in regional and national publications including Outside Bozeman, Segullah, Deseret News, CraziBeautiful Women, and Latter-Day Woman. She is also a columnist for her local paper and a former member of Utah Press Women. One of her short stories was published in the anthology Stolen Christmas. Her first novel, My Gift to You, was released in October 2010.
Lori is currently writing her next novel, Day, about a mother’s relationship with her son. She works as a freelance artist and is the illustrator of the award-winning children's picture book What Are You Thinking? which was released in July 2010 by ThoughtsAlive Publishing. She and her fireman husband live in northern Utah where they enjoy spending time with their four children and two granddaughters, plus an assortment of dogs, rabbits, and chickens.
This is what Lori says about why she wrote this book:
“My Gift to You” is about forgiving ourselves, despite what we perceive as our shortcomings.
When we judge ourselves as less than acceptable for any reason, small mistakes can cripple us with discouragement. It becomes easy to lose sight of our potential, as well as precious opportunities for growth.
I was an only child with ample time to ponder the intricacies of human behavior. At a young age, I became fascinated by the fact that while several people in my life were happy, upbeat, and in possession of inner peace in most if not all circumstances, some seemed inherently unhappy no matter what happened—good or bad. Money and possessions didn’t seem to have a bearing, and I wondered what did.
Though I’d been baptized when I was eight, my family didn’t attend church. If I wanted to go, I had to attend on my own. It took me a while to grasp gospel concepts, and I found that most of the time I was among those who were unhappy. About twenty years ago I decided to stop asking Why me? and instead start asking What if?
One by one, I replaced negative emotions with those of a positive nature. Instead of wondering why I couldn't make everyone around me happy—and becoming despondent because nothing I did seemed to change them or their opinions—I started asking things like, "What if happiness really is a choice? What if it can be my choice, no matter what anyone else thinks or feels?"
Instead of commiserating over why my extended family couldn't accept me for who I was and what I believed in, I asked myself, "What if I could choose my own thoughts and emotions based on what I know in my heart is right and true?" In short, "What if I accept myself for who I am?"
And, "What if I forgive—knowing that forgiveness doesn't mean acceptance?"
When I began writing “My Gift to You,” I decided I wanted my main character, Trish, to discover something important about herself: I wanted her to discover her own inner strengths and worth—much like I had when I began to unravel my own life.
I think this sounds like a beautiful book and I look forward to reading it.
My Challenge
Lori shares some powerful points above. I also believe we can choose our emotions. Today I would like to challenge you to choose to be happy, content, and to feel at peace. Make choices throughout the day that will help make your choice for happiness easier.
Then try it tomorrow and the next day. With conscious effort, try to focus on what you are feeling and choose to feel how you want to for the rest of the week.
At the Women's Conference I spoke at last week I touched some on the concepts behind intuitive eating but I didn't have the time to go into it.
I want to first explain what it is, this is the statement on Intuitive Eating.org:
"Intuitive eating is an approach that teaches you how to create a healthy relationship with your food, mind, and body--where you ultimately become the expert of your own body. You learn how to distinguish between physical and emotional feelings, and gain a sense of body wisdom. It's also a process of making peace with food---so that you no longer have constant "food worry" thoughts. It's knowing that your health and your worth as a person does not change because you ate a so-called "bad" or "fattening" food."
When I started counseling for anorexia after I left the hospital my counselor said he was going to use the same treatment for me as he would a person who weighed 400 pounds struggling with food addictions.
I learned then that overeating or under eating is caused by the same underlining issues.
At that time he introduced a little bit of the concept behind intuitive eating but it wasn't called that. He focused on trusting your body and trying to get me to learn to connect to my bodies needs again. (Also he helped me begin to work out the underlining issues which is key to recovery on the emotional end.)
I then started using the intuitive eating methods without even knowing it by just doing what I discovered was and wasn't working for me. For example I noticed I actually LOST weight during the HOLIDAYS! After a year or two of this happening I finally connected that it was because I gave myself complete permission to eat whatever I wanted because "it was the holidays" and eating certain treats was part of the celebration. I didn't deprive myself of anything and so naturally I was listening to my body more. I found myself wanting less because there were no "forbidden" foods or amounts. I later learned this is the major concept behind intuitive eating - banning nothing. It really does keep you from obsessing.
For instants if I told you that you could eat anything you want for the next week except for blueberry muffins, guess what will happen? You will crave and obsess over blueberry muffins!!!
Restricting leads to obsessing, then eventually when you do "give in" it usually leads to binging, then feelings of guilt, then the cycle often starts over again.
Then I took a course at college about eating behaviors and the principals were taught as a healthy way to create a better relationship with food. I really grabbed hold of it then, like I said before, I never heard the actual term intuitive eating until recently but people were learning the truth behind these principals then, and they do work and did for me.
Why intuitive eating? Because diets don't work! 95 Percent of Dieters Regain Weight Within 1 to 5 Years (-Tom at RealSelf on Jul 2, 2009)
Here is a summary of the 10 principles of Intuitive Eating, from the book, Intuitive Eating, 2nd ed, 2003.
by Evelyn Tribole, MS, RD and Elyse Resch, MS, RD, FADA
Intuitive Eating Principles
1. Reject the Diet Mentality Throw out the diet books and magazine articles that offer you false hope of losing weight quickly, easily, and permanently. Get angry at the lies that have led you to feel as if you were a failure every time a new diet stopped working and you gained back all of the weight. If you allow even one small hope to linger that a new and better diet might be lurking around the corner, it will prevent you from being free to rediscover Intuitive Eating.
2. Honor Your Hunger Keep your body biologically fed with adequate energy and carbohydrates. Otherwise you can trigger a primal drive to overeat. Once you reach the moment of excessive hunger, all intentions of moderate, conscious eating are fleeting and irrelevant. Learning to honor this first biological signal sets the stage for re-building trust with yourself and food.
3. Make Peace with Food Call a truce, stop the food fight! Give yourself unconditional permission to eat. If you tell yourself that you can't or shouldn't have a particular food, it can lead to intense feelings of deprivation that build into uncontrollable cravings and, often, bingeing When you finally “give-in” to your forbidden food, eating will be experienced with such intensity, it usually results in Last Supper overeating, and overwhelming guilt.
4. Challenge the Food Police .Scream a loud "NO" to thoughts in your head that declare you're "good" for eating under 1000 calories or "bad" because you ate a piece of chocolate cake. The Food Police monitor the unreasonable rules that dieting has created . The police station is housed deep in your psyche, and its loud speaker shouts negative barbs, hopeless phrases, and guilt-provoking indictments. Chasing the Food Police away is a critical step in returning to Intuitive Eating.
5. Respect Your Fullness Listen for the body signals that tell you that you are no longer hungry. Observe the signs that show that you're comfortably full. Pause in the middle of a meal or food and ask yourself how the food tastes, and what is your current fullness level?
6. Discover the Satisfaction Factor The Japanese have the wisdom to promote pleasure as one of their goals of healthy living In our fury to be thin and healthy, we often overlook one of the most basic gifts of existence--the pleasure and satisfaction that can be found in the eating experience. When you eat what you really want, in an environment that is inviting and conducive, the pleasure you derive will be a powerful force in helping you feel satisfied and content. By providing this experience for yourself, you will find that it takes much less food to decide you've had "enough".
7. Honor Your Feelings Without Using Food Find ways to comfort , nurture, distract, and resolve your issues without using food. Anxiety, loneliness, boredom, anger are emotions we all experience throughout life. Each has its own trigger, and each has its own appeasement. Food won't fix any of these feelings. It may comfort for the short term, distract from the pain, or even numb you into a food hangover. But food won't solve the problem. If anything, eating for an emotional hunger will only make you feel worse in the long run. You'll ultimately have to deal with the source of the emotion, as well as the discomfort of overeating.
8. Respect Your Body Accept your genetic blueprint. Just as a person with a shoe size of eight would not expect to realistically squeeze into a size six, it is equally as futile (and uncomfortable) to have the same expectation with body size. But mostly, respect your body, so you can feel better about who you are. It's hard to reject the diet mentality if you are unrealistic and overly critical about your body shape.
9. Exercise--Feel the Difference Forget militant exercise. Just get active and feel the difference. Shift your focus to how it feels to move your body, rather than the calorie burning effect of exercise. If you focus on how you feel from working out, such as energized, it can make the difference between rolling out of bed for a brisk morning walk or hitting the snooze alarm. If when you wake up, your only goal is to lose weight, it's usually not a motivating factor in that moment of time.
10 Honor Your Health--Gentle Nutrition Make food choices that honor your health and taste buds while making you feel well. Remember that you don't have to eat a perfect diet to be healthy. You will not suddenly get a nutrient deficiency or gain weight from one snack, one meal, or one day of eating. It's what you eat consistently over time that matters, progress not perfection is what counts.
Challenge:
I would like to challenge you to pick a step from the list above and try it. I would recommend starting with giving yourself unlimited permission to eat all foods. No more restricting!
I think there are several books about Intuitive Eating but this is the one that I have gotten the info from and it looks like a great resource.
"It is so inspiring for anyone to read! Even if you or no one you know has an eating disorder. It is a book of endurance, faith, hope, courage, parental unconditional love, knowledge of the life after death, and a renewal of life......a miracle!" --Kristen, Pasco, Washington
“I truly couldn’t put it down. It’s the best book I’ve ever read and I can’t [wait] to start over and read it again!
"It is truly inspiring. I had so many ‘a-ha’ moments
“Haley, thank you thank you thank you for this amazing gift!
“A Future for Tomorrow is truly an inspiration and blessing for girls everywhere to read, especially those who are struggling with their own worth.” – Laura Fullmer, Perry, Utah, recovering anorexia patient.
"I was enthralled the entire time. It's truly powerful, I felt Haley's beautiful, indomitable spirit pouring through those pages!" Cherie Burton, Mrs. Utah 2004
"Wow!I have been so consumed by a book that I fell asleep reading last night and woke up at 6am to start reading again. I have been very touched. Not only do I feel uplifted by this story but I see how I need to change my view of myself and treat my body better.
If you want a sweet read I would suggest you get a copy of her book! Amazing!" --Brenda H.
“This book is so important. What lives it can impact. I know for myself it gave me hope and blessed me with an even keener sense of our Father's love.” --Lori Nawyn, graphic designer, author, artist, and photographer.
"Beautiful! I was left breathless several times. I felt as though I was right there beside Haley, witnessing all these events, my heart breaking for her, her family, and friends." -- Kelly, Eagle Mountain, Utah
“A Future for Tomorrow" is a book that shows a young woman's faith, courage and hope.
I feel that Haley's book, is a gift to the world, in helping fight anorexia.
I know that many people's lives will be blessed because of her gift in sharing her story. It is written very well and is a very compelling story.
I for one, am going to be sharing this book with as many people as possible.”—Sheila, book reviewer and pod-cast interviewer.
"Haley's book, written in the first person, is as tense and dramatic as a thriller novel. "--Tamara Heiner, book reviewer and writer.
"I absolutely loved A Future for Tomorrow . It is beautifully written and chuck full of the spirit." -- Mandy, Daybreak, Utah
"I am so happy that Haley has written her experience, the world needs her. She has a gift of written word." -- Glory, Evanston, Wyoming
"I was so amazed of how the impossible can be possible with the gospel and priesthood blessings. It made me appreciate the gospel and know that anything can be possible with His plan."-- Erin, Washington DC
“A must read for every women and girl.” --Cristianne, Eagle Mountain Utah
“Haley Freeman has provided a uniquely personal and revealing account of how destructive eating disorders can be as well as how they can be overcome. Her story offers insight and hope to families impacted by this illness.” --Shawn C. Edgington, PH.D. Psychologist
"It truly spoke to my spirit. I could NOT put it down.” –Alicia, Eagle Mountain, Utah
"A Future for Tomorrow is a heart-wrenching look into the mind and heart of a young girl who struggles with anorexia and shows the reader what it's like to battle the disease every day. While at times the story is sorrowful, in the end I came away filled with the knowledge that for all those who suffer with debilitating eating disorders, there is hope. There is promise. They can be made whole again and look to their futures with joy and happiness as Haley did, leaning on her relationship with Jesus Christ and coming to a deeper understanding of her true place as a daughter of God." --Tristi Pinkston, LDS Author and MediaReviewer
“I am so overwhelmed by the spirit Haley’s words have sent to me. Even though I haven't struggled with a battle over food, I have often struggled with self doubt and feelings of unworthiness, much like many women I feel do. Her story can touch so many lives because so many people will relate to her feelings. I truly feel it is inspired.”-- Megan, Salt Lake City, Utah
"It's so nice for me to read about someone's else who had such a similar experience to mine--someone who I could really relate to and vice versa. Because one of the terrible things about anorexia is the feeling of being completely alone. It's nice to know that there is someone else out there who can really understand." --Micaela, recovered from anorexia
"I think this book should be the first thing you see when you walk into Barnes and Noble, on a huge rack display." --Dr. Jack Stockwell
" What an amazing story. I want the world to read it!"--Liz, Scipio Utah
"Her story shed a whole new light on this disease for me and I will never again hear the word anorexia without thinking of Haley's story." --J. Adams, Author and motivational speaker
"I became very attached to Haley and her battle to become healthy - and felt the need to know what was going to happen to her next. I HIGHLY recommend this book to EVERY young lady, woman, and parent. QOTC Rating: Five Stars" -- Danyelle Ferguson, Writer, Book Editor & Reviewer
"After reading Haley's book, I had the desire to look at myself through Heavenly Father's eyes and see the good in His child. And I have Haley to thank for that..." -- Stacy Gooch Anderson, Author & Reviewer
"Haley tells a vivid and inspiring account of overcoming physical and spiritual roadblocks to find the true road to happiness." Rebecca Talley, Children's Author and LDS Author
"As I finished the last page and closed the book, I found myself thinking that all youth, youth leaders and parents should read this book. It provides a depth of understanding that everyone could benefit from. Not only could it help those struggling with the same issues Haley did, but it can provide parents, siblings and leaders with the knowledge and understanding they need to help anyone who is dealing with anorexia or who could develop this disease. It’s a must read!" --Shari Bird, Tooele Utah
"A Future for Tomorrow would be a great book for a young woman and a mom to read and discuss. It would be a meaty book for a book club to discuss. It is sure to spark a lively debate." -- Liz Adair, Author
"This book is not meant just for people suffering from an eating disorder but for anyone who has ever doubted there self worth or if God loves them. It is truly inspiring.
"Haley has such an amazing ability to express herself through words. I love her attention to detail and being able to help the reader visualize the people she mentions. She really is able to draw in the reader into the experience. I love the way she writes!"--Marci, South Jordan, Utah
"I sat on a bathroom floor for five hours finishing the book because I couldn't put it down. I stayed up all night with two kids to send off to school the next day. That's how great this book was and is something I think everyone should read.
"Haley's story has brought me peace in remembering my mother's last days and she has helped me to understand myself in ways I couldn't before. I wish I could give a copy of this book to each of my young women, but at least I can use the principles I have learned to help them to love themselves and love their bodies and see themselves the way that Heavenly Father does." --Karen Hoover, Writer
"Haley Hatch Freeman for her courage in laying open her heart and soul to her readers. She doesn’t hold back, and on every page you can feel her desire to help others through her own experience.
"It is very much an LDS book, but I would give it to others not of the LDS faith in a heartbeat, because of the in-depth look into the eating disorder." --Jaime Theler, LDS non-fiction Author
" This book has the potential to serve as a wake-up call to us as parents, friends, and women. "--Nichole Giles, Writer
"In 'A Future for Tomorrow,' Haley bravely recounts her journey to the brink of death and back again in a way that is both touching and inspiring.
"The frankness with which Haley describes her journey is remarkable. She opens her heart and mind to her readers because she feels called to let others know how devastating anorexia nervosa can be."--Bestselling LDS authors Lael Littke and Carroll Morris
"I couldn't put it down. There is no words to discribe the emotions that cursed through me. I cried through most of it, laughed at the funny parts, got ticked off at some of the doctors, and cheered for Haley at the end, literally. A Furture for Tomorrow was inspired in every way. I am sad at what she went through, but grateful that she is courageous enough to tell a story every daughter of God needs to hear. I thank Haley for taking me on her journey, I learned so much, and got a glimpse of what many many young woman are going through these last days, and more importantly, a great reminder of the love our Heavenly Father and Savoir have for us." --Catherine M. Lang, Writer, Logan, UT.
"I highly recommend it to anyone who is struggling with or trying to help someone struggling with an eating disorder. If I'd known things then that this book has helped me to learn, perhaps I could have helped her more. It is also great for the casual reader, an interesting view for those who have never dealt with this kind of self hatred or addictive behavior. Surprisingly, for such a depressing and scary topic, it is extremely uplifting and inspirational. Definitely five stars!" Melody Litton, Oak Ridge, Tennessee
In just two days one of my dreams will come true! I'm elated for this opportunity to share my information with the their large audience. I can't wait to meet the ladies and hopefully help viewers. 
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