I want to make a plea to women everywhere and to especially mothers. It’s time we step it up. I see the repercussions of this issue almost daily in the field I’m in with my public speaking and my books’ topics and I don’t think women get it and the damage they do to their children without even knowing it.
I believe we do better when we know better so my hopes are with this message that maybe just one mother will change her conversation and influence her daughters and other women around her once she knows better.
To make my point I’m going to share three true situations I’ve come across just in the last couple of weeks.
True Scenario #1:
At dinner, a teenager girl was scolded by her mother as her mother observed the daughter’s plate of food, her mother said, “you will never keep your figure if you keep eating that way.” Really? Does this mother think this comment is helpful? First of all, make no mistake these type of statements sting and will be moments this girl will never forget. The words might even feaster into an eating disorder one day. Best case scenario the teen has been taught that her appearance is very important to her mother and that her size needs to stay under a specific weight to be acceptable in her mother’s eyes. Next, the teen has been taught she now needs to hide the amount of food she eats from her mother. Most likely, the teen will now crave even more “forbidden” foods and eat them in secret, creating an unhealthy relationship with food that she will probably fight her entire life.
True Scenario #2:
A seven year old girl was offered nourishing milk to go along with her meal, she replied. “no, I don’t want milk. My mom told me it will make me fat.” Wow. I was blown away when I heard this with my own ears! Firsts of all, that is false. Statistics show people who drink milk actually weigh less than those who don’t. And metabolically calcium aids in weight lose because calcium stored in fat cells plays an important role in breaking down fat, it also helps with the body's fat-burning.
But that is besides the fact, how sad it is that a mother would tell a SEVEN year old to not eat or drink something to prevent “getting fat.” Again, this has taught this young girl, who shouldn’t even have fat and food intake on her radar yet, that weight is important and being heavier is bad and not acceptable.
True Scenario #3
This is actually an accumulation of events. I have yet to attend any kind of party, shower, or any other gathering of women where the conversation doesn’t end up being about diets and how they “shouldn’t” have the refreshment. Really ladies? Are we not of deeper substance and intellect than to not have anything else to say to each other besides what our fitbit bands say or what our next diet strategy will be? Personally it drives me crazy and I think it’s a poor example to the little listening ears around us who are watching us, learning to emulate how they too will interact with peers when they grow up. We need to step it up. Hold ourselves to a higher standard. Decide that we want a better world for our daughters and next generation of girls. Teach them to value intrinsic characteristics. Let them hear us discuss services projects, educational acclimates, spirituality, and the building of each other up by complimenting each other on something besides each other’s weight loss and appearances. I know we can do better when we know better, please ladies let’s step it up.