I'm frustrated with of messages that link food with emotion or sin. The one that bothers me more than others is "Fat-free, guilt-free cookies or ice cream..." I remember linking guilt with food at a young age partially because of media and these ads. We've all heard "Chocolate is my guilty pleasure."
There is a commercial that ran not too long ago for Subway, it said something like this:
"You could eat this hamburger and lose your boyfriend, your self-esteem, etc... (it continued to list the dire effects) or you could eat this low-fat subway instead." It listed several things you would lose from your sinful behavior of eating a hamburger but the two that stuck out at me and bothered me the most were those two. So if you eat a hamburger you will gain weight and that is unworthy for good self-esteem or to retain a boyfriend! Shame on Subway!
I was on a date with my husband this week and at dinner I saw this staring at me from across the table.
There are countless messages similar every where we turn. The key to combat these ads is: *Awareness, make your impressionable children aware of the lies behind these statements. *Never reward your child with food, this tells them that good behavior entitles food, or maybe just certain "treats". *I'm not saying to become hermits or sequester all media, just be aware and counter these ads with the truth. Ask yourself or your children, "What is this ad trying to sell me?" "What are the motives behind this ad?" *Never say "Oh, did you have a bad day today? Here are some cookies and milk that will make you feel better."
That leads me to media once again. How many times have you seen on TV the girl that gets dumped by her boyfriend or who has had a bad day, throwing herself on her couch with a pint of ice cream and spoon. The message behind this is infuriating to me. Food should never be linked to emotion or even comfort. It is a substance that is ok to enjoy but not to treat a problem. Binges might surpress unwelcome feelings for the time but this is only a bandaid that will actually only create more problems later. Behind ever binge is an emotional issue. It is no wonder we have learned to cope with trauma by eating... look at the connections we are bombarded with "Happiness begins with dessert."
I want to get this out there... if you or someone you know is suffering from and eating disorder and need help, advice, or support please feel free to leave me a comment on here or e-mail at email@example.com
There is hope and a beautiful life a joy waiting for you.
This is one of the most asked questions I get. I was asked this question live on the radio during my interview last month. It is also one of the hardest for me to answer and I want to know what you would do and what you think. Question: What do you do or say to a child, especially a daughter who is over weight? You don't want to hurt her feelings or cause a possible eating disorder.
I will add what I think in a later post I first want your opinions. Thank you!
I'm interested in hearing your responses regarding a few issues. I am going to periodically post a question which I hope you will answer by leaving a comment. You can even answer anonymously if you wish.
I'm curious to see how many of you feel that you have taken unhealthy steps for the purpose of losing weight. In your life time have you taken diet pills? Made yourself throw up? Fasted (not for religious purposes)? Tried a fad diet? Exercises obsessively?
If you haven't I would also like to hear a no response so I can conclude some sort of statistic.
My virtual book tour starts officially today!! To participate go to the blog sites listed on the right side of my blog and leave your comment on their blog. To see the first scheduled review click on the link below. Again, be sure to leave your comment and to send all your blog friends to this site too.
"It is so inspiring for anyone to read! Even if you or no one you know has an eating disorder. It is a book of endurance, faith, hope, courage, parental unconditional love, knowledge of the life after death, and a renewal of life......a miracle!" --Kristen, Pasco, Washington
“I truly couldn’t put it down. It’s the best book I’ve ever read and I can’t [wait] to start over and read it again!
"It is truly inspiring. I had so many ‘a-ha’ moments
“Haley, thank you thank you thank you for this amazing gift!
“A Future for Tomorrow is truly an inspiration and blessing for girls everywhere to read, especially those who are struggling with their own worth.” – Laura Fullmer, Perry, Utah, recovering anorexia patient.
"I was enthralled the entire time. It's truly powerful, I felt Haley's beautiful, indomitable spirit pouring through those pages!" Cherie Burton, Mrs. Utah 2004
"Wow!I have been so consumed by a book that I fell asleep reading last night and woke up at 6am to start reading again. I have been very touched. Not only do I feel uplifted by this story but I see how I need to change my view of myself and treat my body better.
If you want a sweet read I would suggest you get a copy of her book! Amazing!" --Brenda H.
“This book is so important. What lives it can impact. I know for myself it gave me hope and blessed me with an even keener sense of our Father's love.” --Lori Nawyn, graphic designer, author, artist, and photographer.
"Beautiful! I was left breathless several times. I felt as though I was right there beside Haley, witnessing all these events, my heart breaking for her, her family, and friends." -- Kelly, Eagle Mountain, Utah
“A Future for Tomorrow" is a book that shows a young woman's faith, courage and hope.
I feel that Haley's book, is a gift to the world, in helping fight anorexia.
I know that many people's lives will be blessed because of her gift in sharing her story. It is written very well and is a very compelling story.
I for one, am going to be sharing this book with as many people as possible.”—Sheila, book reviewer and pod-cast interviewer.
"Haley's book, written in the first person, is as tense and dramatic as a thriller novel. "--Tamara Heiner, book reviewer and writer.
"I absolutely loved A Future for Tomorrow . It is beautifully written and chuck full of the spirit." -- Mandy, Daybreak, Utah
"I am so happy that Haley has written her experience, the world needs her. She has a gift of written word." -- Glory, Evanston, Wyoming
"I was so amazed of how the impossible can be possible with the gospel and priesthood blessings. It made me appreciate the gospel and know that anything can be possible with His plan."-- Erin, Washington DC
“A must read for every women and girl.” --Cristianne, Eagle Mountain Utah
“Haley Freeman has provided a uniquely personal and revealing account of how destructive eating disorders can be as well as how they can be overcome. Her story offers insight and hope to families impacted by this illness.” --Shawn C. Edgington, PH.D. Psychologist
"It truly spoke to my spirit. I could NOT put it down.” –Alicia, Eagle Mountain, Utah
"A Future for Tomorrow is a heart-wrenching look into the mind and heart of a young girl who struggles with anorexia and shows the reader what it's like to battle the disease every day. While at times the story is sorrowful, in the end I came away filled with the knowledge that for all those who suffer with debilitating eating disorders, there is hope. There is promise. They can be made whole again and look to their futures with joy and happiness as Haley did, leaning on her relationship with Jesus Christ and coming to a deeper understanding of her true place as a daughter of God." --Tristi Pinkston, LDS Author and MediaReviewer
“I am so overwhelmed by the spirit Haley’s words have sent to me. Even though I haven't struggled with a battle over food, I have often struggled with self doubt and feelings of unworthiness, much like many women I feel do. Her story can touch so many lives because so many people will relate to her feelings. I truly feel it is inspired.”-- Megan, Salt Lake City, Utah
"It's so nice for me to read about someone's else who had such a similar experience to mine--someone who I could really relate to and vice versa. Because one of the terrible things about anorexia is the feeling of being completely alone. It's nice to know that there is someone else out there who can really understand." --Micaela, recovered from anorexia
"I think this book should be the first thing you see when you walk into Barnes and Noble, on a huge rack display." --Dr. Jack Stockwell
" What an amazing story. I want the world to read it!"--Liz, Scipio Utah
"Her story shed a whole new light on this disease for me and I will never again hear the word anorexia without thinking of Haley's story." --J. Adams, Author and motivational speaker
"I became very attached to Haley and her battle to become healthy - and felt the need to know what was going to happen to her next. I HIGHLY recommend this book to EVERY young lady, woman, and parent. QOTC Rating: Five Stars" -- Danyelle Ferguson, Writer, Book Editor & Reviewer
"After reading Haley's book, I had the desire to look at myself through Heavenly Father's eyes and see the good in His child. And I have Haley to thank for that..." -- Stacy Gooch Anderson, Author & Reviewer
"Haley tells a vivid and inspiring account of overcoming physical and spiritual roadblocks to find the true road to happiness." Rebecca Talley, Children's Author and LDS Author
"As I finished the last page and closed the book, I found myself thinking that all youth, youth leaders and parents should read this book. It provides a depth of understanding that everyone could benefit from. Not only could it help those struggling with the same issues Haley did, but it can provide parents, siblings and leaders with the knowledge and understanding they need to help anyone who is dealing with anorexia or who could develop this disease. It’s a must read!" --Shari Bird, Tooele Utah
"A Future for Tomorrow would be a great book for a young woman and a mom to read and discuss. It would be a meaty book for a book club to discuss. It is sure to spark a lively debate." -- Liz Adair, Author
"This book is not meant just for people suffering from an eating disorder but for anyone who has ever doubted there self worth or if God loves them. It is truly inspiring.
"Haley has such an amazing ability to express herself through words. I love her attention to detail and being able to help the reader visualize the people she mentions. She really is able to draw in the reader into the experience. I love the way she writes!"--Marci, South Jordan, Utah
"I sat on a bathroom floor for five hours finishing the book because I couldn't put it down. I stayed up all night with two kids to send off to school the next day. That's how great this book was and is something I think everyone should read.
"Haley's story has brought me peace in remembering my mother's last days and she has helped me to understand myself in ways I couldn't before. I wish I could give a copy of this book to each of my young women, but at least I can use the principles I have learned to help them to love themselves and love their bodies and see themselves the way that Heavenly Father does." --Karen Hoover, Writer
"Haley Hatch Freeman for her courage in laying open her heart and soul to her readers. She doesn’t hold back, and on every page you can feel her desire to help others through her own experience.
"It is very much an LDS book, but I would give it to others not of the LDS faith in a heartbeat, because of the in-depth look into the eating disorder." --Jaime Theler, LDS non-fiction Author
" This book has the potential to serve as a wake-up call to us as parents, friends, and women. "--Nichole Giles, Writer
"In 'A Future for Tomorrow,' Haley bravely recounts her journey to the brink of death and back again in a way that is both touching and inspiring.
"The frankness with which Haley describes her journey is remarkable. She opens her heart and mind to her readers because she feels called to let others know how devastating anorexia nervosa can be."--Bestselling LDS authors Lael Littke and Carroll Morris
"I couldn't put it down. There is no words to discribe the emotions that cursed through me. I cried through most of it, laughed at the funny parts, got ticked off at some of the doctors, and cheered for Haley at the end, literally. A Furture for Tomorrow was inspired in every way. I am sad at what she went through, but grateful that she is courageous enough to tell a story every daughter of God needs to hear. I thank Haley for taking me on her journey, I learned so much, and got a glimpse of what many many young woman are going through these last days, and more importantly, a great reminder of the love our Heavenly Father and Savoir have for us." --Catherine M. Lang, Writer, Logan, UT.
"I highly recommend it to anyone who is struggling with or trying to help someone struggling with an eating disorder. If I'd known things then that this book has helped me to learn, perhaps I could have helped her more. It is also great for the casual reader, an interesting view for those who have never dealt with this kind of self hatred or addictive behavior. Surprisingly, for such a depressing and scary topic, it is extremely uplifting and inspirational. Definitely five stars!" Melody Litton, Oak Ridge, Tennessee